stuck in bed and trapped beneath the sheets i still
haven’t washed since you left. the weight of
the whole night pinning me down.
hard to breathe, hard to see.
waiting for the other hammer to fall. i dearly miss the love i never had.
i never knew how little i had had until it imploded.
the nights are longer, the sun is more blinding.
the air is drier and the people more distant.
i can’t pretend to be happy without it feeling like a wake.
wake.
awake.
away.
too far gone.
everything is grey as ash, heavy as stone.
i couldn’t hold onto you any more than myself.
take me on without taking me down.
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